A Jedi In Motion

Today is the day. Now, I've never seen the Midnight showing of any movie before so this is going to be new to me. I've seen many movies that premiered that night but nothing so big as this one. The whole Star Wars saga is special to me in so many ways. Let's start with the merchandising. I had everything. DeathStar, Millenium Falcon, all the action figures,etc. The Star Wars toys were certainly a mainstay for several Christmas mornings and certainly paved the way for the cruel, Hellborn, creative mind to take shape. Let's face it. If I were directing a film with the scenarios I'd play in my head with those toys....Faces of Death would be a PBS After School special.
In reality, The Empire Strikes Back holds a special place in my heart. Oh, it's in the deepest, blackest recesses of my heart but it's there nonetheless. Let me explain. Let's see....I'm...umm...8 years old. My mother is married to a surgeon at the time and I was to have surgery on my knee that I knew nothing about. So, they take me to "Empire" on Friday night and we go out to eat. Nothing special. Not my birthday or anything but they are playing it up like it is. So, afterwards I go to sleep and am suddenly awakened at 4 in the morning with my Mother and Step-Father hovering over my bed...in Stormtrooper outfits!!!! Just kidding. No outfits but there they are with a chocolate milkshake they want me to drink. I must say and can now confess that it tasted like shit. They kept making me drink it because it had some sedative in it. So, after I finish that, they had my bags all packed and take me to the hospital. It's 4:20-4:30am and to this day I can still remember the ride in from Brandon to Sioux Falls. No idea what was happening and didn't really care as all I can think about is the movie the night before. Seeing all the scenes in my head, I remember the battle between Darth and Luke most.
I'm at the hospital and now in a frenzy 'cause I know something's going down that I don't really like. I go the the first door. The frown is immense on my face. I see a troop of Imperials...err doctors..waiting to torture me. One yells out from behind the surgical mask..."Where's the rebel base!"
I cry and look for the nearest door.
"CLOSE THE BLAST DOORS...CLOSE THE BLAST DOORS!"...A medical tech screams out.
I have now confused the movie with reality in a surreal image of deception and depravity. How ironic that a dark movie about fragile truth has now come to life in an antiseptic hallway at 5am.
The drugs start to work and I tell them that I have important things to do like go potty on Tatooine. I am useless against this surgeon and as sleep takes over....his last words?
"I am your father."
All went well though. With their lightsabers in hand, the doctors did excellent work cutting me up and took care of everything.
As I was wheeled out, I took one last parting shot and with the power of the Force I was able to destroy the west wing of Sioux Valley.
To this day, I can never watch "Empire" and drink a chocolate mikshake at the same time.